cuti,cuti,cuti...and some experiences..

it's been a month of cuti and not much has been going on,i guess..baking almost everyday(carrot cake paling laku), kemas umah, lipat baju, sidau baju, masak n every other thing that's required of the anak dara yg cuti pnjg kt rumah..huhu..hey, i aint complaining!(actually i am;-p) but i hate it when my parents actually order me to do chores..its like,"hey!i wanna lipat bajula today" says myself. then jap lg my dad comes around and says "keena!lipat baju ni.." then tros xde mood nk buat..hehee..anak soleh gile bab..haha..

thank god,esok gi singapore!!universal studios!! In my lifetime up to this momentlah, i've been to universal twice.first time, when i was abt 5 yrs old in florida pegi skali disney world. second time, 10 yrs later we went to florida again, both Universal and Disney. and both times it was........AWESOME! eventho in a few hours ill only be going to the one in singapore and not US, for me it feels like a new chapter but old memories are refreshed in my mind. i like that feeling...i miss my childhood when i was growing up kt US and the only worry i had was what would barbie wear for the picnic with Ken.but i do enjoy life now too though...but there will always be ups and downs.life doesn't remain static and we keep growing older. thats why memories are so important to keep and to keep on making them.we'll see how the memory-making goes tomorrow huh?:-)

some experiences are new to me this year..like tonight, for instance. I just sorta realized that my mood or happiness now doesn't depend solely on myself anymore. There are other ppl in my life now that affect it..i'm not too sure if its a bad thing or a good thing...at the moment,it feels like a bad one. its like im freakin happy coz il be going to singapore in a few hrs, but then i know when i come back there'll be a nagging feeling abt someone im close to who i sorta fought with...huhu..i dont really like it.i dont feel as independent or strong as i used to.i feel vulnerable, and that's something i'm too familiar with and wanna try to avoid......but...despite all that, the reward of opening urself up to others and sharing ur life with loved ones, i admit, is probably worth all that trouble...it's hard sometimes,sure..but maybe, that vulnerability shows that ur heart has grown in order for others to be apart of it? doesn't that show that u've become stronger?

i dont know...

i used to think that instead of hurting urself or risking heartache or pain, play it safe and i'll be ok..but sometimes, it's good to shake things up a lil bit.taking a leap of faith every once in a while can surprise you..u just gotta be strong and say to urself............

'nah, you'll be ok'

and u know wat.....i just might be;-)